Broken Ornament (12/24/xx)

I had been there before but today was different. That ugly piece of beautiful lying naked on top of me. "Where will this go", I asked and he smiled. He pinned me down gently and bit my lower lip then whispered something in my ear. I couldn't make out of what he said but I knew it was a tacit suggestion to lie still. I could feel the cold wind piercing out of the broken glass of the window. I tried to look out but it was obstructed by an old austere Christmas tree covered with tacky ornaments. Some cracked, some stained and rusty. I studied the tree carefully hoping to find one fine ornament and I did. It was beautiful, well burnished, white and luminous. Hanging on the edge of an anemic branch. I was afraid it was going to fall. I felt a heavy breeze and the fortiuitous ornament landed on a dirty santa doll supported by yet another anemic branch. My teary eyes were pierced on the beautiful ornament. I didn't want it to break. I lied still and there it came. Another breeze.

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Fear of Rejection

I think it worked tonight. I played all my cards right. This dude is trapped. He's not going to sleep tonight, that I am sure of. I know exactly how it's going to play out. He's going to walk into that fancy Brazilian restaurant, probably wearing his favorite black sweater. He's going to forget to smile at first, something he does when he's nervous. Then he'll start out by asking how I'm doing, followed by a compliment and some small talk. He will look around occasionally to catch his breath but I'll keep a constant stare at him to make him a little more uncomfortable. Somewhere in the midst of dinner he will work up the courage to tell me, he will first wipe the sweat off his forehead and then maybe prolong the question with some sort of disclaimer and then it will come. His face will start blushing starting from his ears; He'll try to make some subtle physical contact but will himself shy away. I'll look directly at him and keep a straight face the entire time. He'll pop the question and boom, I'll shoot him down aiming straight for his heart. I have great aim. He waited too long.

I think it's my cue to act. Oh, I can't sleep tonight. It's making me nervous. How am I going to do this? Oh come on, it can't be that difficult. I'll put on something nice, maybe my black sweater. It makes me look thin. I'll walk into the Brazilian restaurant, greet her with a smile, act cool and ask her about her day. Compliments come naturally when I see her, so that will carry the conversation. I'll look around to familiarize myself with the space around us, try to capture the moment. Oh, I hope she's not too attentive, her eyes make me nervous. I will then reach for her hands and calmly ask her what I have been longing for. Oh, who am I kidding? She’ll probably shoot me down and break my heart. It's probably not the right time. Maybe I should wait a little longer.

Om liked the story telling in Melinda and Melinda